Oprah’s life coach coaches me! (Side One)

Actually anyone can receive Martha Beck‘s Daily Inspirations – I’m not THAT special (well, really, I am but that’s another blog all together!).

This morning Martha writes (info@marthabeck.com)

If you scrutinize your own life, you’ll find you do plenty of things that violate the dichotomies in your mind. I certainly do. We’re considerate, selfless, and clever (except for the times we aren’t). Or we’re luckless losers (not counting the infinite things that go right for us every day). This is the problem with either-or thinking: It keeps us removed from reality, and it requires that we spend a lot of time and energy convincing ourselves that life is one particular way (and burying evidence that doesn’t jibe with that view). More important, it will never feel truthful or satisfying—because it leads to an answer that’s only half-right.

The Martha Beck Collection:
Essays for Creating Your Right Life, Volume One

Here’s one thing I have learned – and often the hard way: it’s so much better to take the energy that I might use to

  • make up a story that serves as a excuse for why I’m late,
  • or didn’t do something on time,
  • or just didn’t do what I said I would do

Just owning up to not paying attention to the clock or the calendar or simply forgot takes far less energy. That’s called being human. And being honest. (What a great lesson for your children to see you being this way … they learn by watching how you behave much more profoundly then by what you say.)

So now here we are with the first of several deadlines in the world of pubishing. And, guess what, I have four emails asking for more time with some misspent energy. By this time, I really have heard all of the stories about why covers and end sheets and pages aren’t ready. REALLY I have!  (Yes, that’s an explanation point!)

I did receive one request yesterday that was straight to the point in three simple sentences:

  1. We aren’t going to have 48 pages done on Monday.
  2. We can have 30.
  3. What can we do?

Then I could jump on my white horse and gallup to the rescue. I offered two solutions. The editor then could choose, not feel badly … but she is in line for an explanation from me of the consequences going forward after the deadline is met. She was upfront. I was upfront. We understand how it works.

Straight forward communication with no BS, no time wasted and NO guilt.

Clears up situations quickly and allows us to move forward.

The applications for this go long and far. How about with situations at home (messy room? undone chores? late on paying a bill?)? Or how about speeding on the Turnpike (it isn’t OK because you (I) didn’t get caught … or because everyone else is speeding.

MMM – who knew?  I guess I did but I still have to watch my stories. How about you?

flying monkeys

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